activism – Page 2 – Real Social Skills

Sometimes people who are marginalized assume that other marginalized people are safe by definition. This is really dangerous, and it sets people up for a lot of gaslighting. We need to make sure not to encourage this in activist and otherwise pro-human spaces.

For example, some people do things their stereotypes say they’re incapable of doing:

Some women are sexual abusers
Some autistic people are manipulative bullies

And also, sometimes people do bad things that are (wrongly) stereotypical of their group. For instance:

Some gay people are sexual predators
Some members of minority faiths are destructive fundamentalists.

Some people in marginalized groups do stereotypical or anti-stereotypical bad things, and when this happens, it’s important for activist and other pro-human groups to acknowledge it and not tolerate it.

If you know someone else is in a marginalized group, that’s all you know about them. Don’t assume that they know what it’s like to be mistreated, and are thus safe and trustworthy and would never harm another person. *Especially* when their actions have shown otherwise.

Sometimes it is fun to be angry.

Sometimes it is satisfying. Sometimes it fuels creativity.

And sometimes we get angry on purpose, for the sake of being angry.

We go out and look at angry-making things. To get angry.

It’s ok to do that, up to a point. Because it can be useful, and it can also be an effective way of coping with some of the awful things in the world. (Seeking it out on purpose and dealing with it on your terms can be better than waiting for it to come to you.)

But it’s important to know when you’re seeking out angry-things and not to make an anger-centered world view.

There is a lot to be angry about. A lot a lot a lot. And it’s good to know that. But don’t make the rest of the world disappear, because there’s a lot of good too.

And when you’re doing recreational anger, don’t direct your anger at people who don’t deserve it. It’s ok to get really angry on purpose, but it’s not ok to vent it on someone who innocently used a problematic word after you just read a bunch of horrible articles to make yourself angry.

Make space for anger. Use anger. Use your powers of anger for good. But don’t let it take up all the space.