When someone is abusing you:
- It’s ok not to care why they’re doing it
- Their circumstances aren’t your problem
- Neither is their childhood
- Neither is the possibility that they’re playing out abuse patterns they learned as an abuse victim
These are larger social issues. It’s important that some people work to address them.
But not you. Not with regard to your own abuser. You don’t have to wait for huge social problems to be solved to be allowed to demand that a specific person stop abusing you.
It’s ok, and advisable, to focus on protecting yourself.