Sometimes families can’t get together on holidays or birthdays, even though they want to.

One way of dealing with this is celebrating a fake version of the holiday at a different time.

Eg:

• Frances: I can’t get off work for Thanksgiving this year.
• Jeremy: Me neither. I really miss you though.
• Frances: The airfare is really expensive anyway that week; I couldn’t afford it even if I could get time off then. Want to celebrate fake Thanksgiving the week after instead?
• Jeremy: Ok. Can you take care of ordering the turkey? I’ll make the stuffing and pies.

Or:

• Susan: I’m sorry I’ll be out of the country all month. Let’s celebrate your fake birthday when I get back?
• Heather: Yeah, let’s have a party when you get back.
• Susan: Cool, I’ll make you my chocolate cake, and I’ll bring you something awesome.

If you do all of the things you associate with the holiday or a birthday, it might not matter as much that you’re not able to do it, or not able to do it with family/friends on the day itself. Celebrating the fake holiday on a different day doesn’t work for everyone, but it works really well for some people.